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<< Jackson announces return to Lakers bench
Los Angeles, CA (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Los Angeles Lakers head coach Phil Jackson, fresh off a record 10th NBA Championship as a coach, announced on Friday he will return to the bench next year for a 10th season in LA and 19th as an N

<< Diao close to signing new Stoke deal
Stoke-on-Trent, England (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Stoke City midfielder Salif Diao is close to agreeing a new contract to remain at the Britannia Stadium. The 32-year-old Senegal international is out of contract and had been interesting se

<< Sunderland rejects Ferdinand rumors
Sunderland, England (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Sunderland chairman Niall Quinn has rejected suggestions that the Black Cats are willing to part with Anton Ferdinand this summer. Ferdinand had a mixed first season on Wearside following

<< All expected Haskell favorites at Monmouth
Oceanport, NJ (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Two days after Arkansas Derby winner Papa Clem arrived at Monmouth Park for next month's Haskell Invitational. Belmont Stakes champ Summer Bird settled into his stall at the Jersey shore track. With th

Braves' Johnson hits DL with wrist tendinitis >>
Washington, DC (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - The Atlanta Braves have placed second baseman Kelly Johnson on the 15-day disabled with right wrist tendinitis. Johnson has struggled thus far in 2009, hitting just .214 with five home runs, 20 runs b

Falkirk agrees to terms with Finnigan >>
Falkirk, Scotland (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Falkirk have agreed to a new contract with free agent striker Carl Finnigan. Finnigan, 22, scored five goals in 19 appearances for the Bairns last season despite missing large portions of the year t

M's Hernandez named AL Pitcher of the Month >>
New York, NY (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Seattle Mariners right-hander Felix Hernandez was named the American League's Pitcher of the Month for June. Over six starts, Hernandez went 3-0 with an 0.94 earned run average, allowing only four

Upton named AL Player of the Month >>
New York, NY (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Tampa Bay outfielder B.J. Upton was selected as the American League Player of the Month for June. Upton, who garnered his first monthly honor, hit .324 in 26 games during June. He also belted five homers, s

FOOTBALL TRASH TALK

Trash talk has a place in every competitive endeavor (except baseball; those stirrup-wearers are too busy chewing on their sunflower seeds and their supplements to worry about what their opponents are doing).

Fantasy sports is no exception. Any intelligent discussion of the subject would probably start with a thesis statement or a definition of terms. Thankfully, this wont be an intelligent discussion.

Let me just say that I am happy to take a place in this space alongside my talented colleagues, even our commissioner. (You should see how she bleats like a demented paper boy about league fees on our fantasy site).

Trash talking, I would argue, is primarily about amusing your friends, their sheeplike demeanors and sloping foreheads notwithstanding. The best place I have found for football trash talking is at www.SportsAlarm.com.

Beyond the entertainment factor, though, I would recognize that the sophomoric ritual has one advantage, when properly applied. It magnifies your fantasy triumphs and mitigates your fantasy failures by transforming the eventual point total into an afterthought. Winning makes it seem like your opponent really is a truss-owning, lapel-pin-wearing nitwit. And in defeat, trash talk can be the air bag to break the fall from your hyperbolic heights. The plug-necked yahoos on your team, you can say, will be sacking groceries by the end of the season.

The best trash talk, in my view, is layered and nuanced. And it doesnt focus only on your opponents team. It picks apart your opponent. The idea is to create a shock-and-awe-scale blizzard of nonsense, and the goal is to make your opponent drop his hands from his keyboard in exasperation.

What team does your opponent root for? Accuse a Giants fan of having a Joe Namath pillowcase. Wheres your opponent from? Give a look of concern no matter his reply, then say, I'll try to type slower for you next time. Is your opponent into politics? Label everyone a tax-and-spend corporate shill.

Cap all that with a liberal application of irrelevance. For instance, dont just conclude by saying your opponent is a twerp who drafts like my grandmother. Say that your opponent is a sweater-wearing, eyebrow-plucking twerp who drafts his team about as well as Zsa Zsa Gabor gave acceptance speeches at the Oscars. By the time your foe makes sense of that, his starting running back will have had puppies.

But what about you? Hmm? Recall a memorable slam? Have a tried-and-true technique? Know someone who seems impervious to insult? Take a moment and tells us about it. Put together some (fit-for-publication) thoughts. You wont be too busy returning phone messages from your friends, Im sure, to reply.

In addition to the trash talking, the Sports Alarm has a huge gallery of high resolution pictures of beautiful women and models in bikinis. The most popular models are: Lindsay Lohan, Carrie Underwood, Alessandra Ambrosio, and Paris Hilton.

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To visit this online sportsbook got to MySportsbook.com for all your football wagering needs.